My site
"I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is 'Who in the world am I?' Ah, that's the great puzzle!" - Alice, Alice In Wonderland.
Foundation.

Once again, I'm glad that I've stopped myself before I got too attached.
I wanted to trust you, but your immaturity stopped me from doing so.
It's tiring how I'm trying, and yet you take my efforts for granted.

Maybe you want me to go after you,
Maybe I should.
But this chase is far too weary for me alone.
Nobody's in it with me, nobody wants to be.

There was a period of time when I thought that I could trust you,
Till I realized that your selfishness isn't what I want.
I shouldn't save a spot for someone who won't stay,
That's why I'm moving on.

There's nothing I can do to change your mind.
You're the only one who can change it.
You told me so yourself, and I won't deny it.
Yet you're so adamant about the fact that you're right.
So tell me, what am I to do?
Cos' I know you're heading down the wrong path, but because of the stance that I'm in, I can't correct you.
I'm in no position to.

I can't read your mind.
I never will.
Do you want me to go after you or not? I don't know.
This friendship looks a lot like a tragedy to me now.

For the last time, I say that I'm not bothering.
But I am bothered by how I am not bothered.
This just isn't like me.
Yet, if this is what I think you want, and what I think is best for myself, I have to stop.
There's no turning back.

I'm still standing here in the same spot,
Waiting for you.
But as the days pass,
All I get is coldness.
& I'm hit with the realization that we aren't what we thought we were.

What's left are my numb fingertips.
My numb fingertips that are holding on to the cracks in our foundation.
I know that I should forget, but I can't.
I know that I should let go, but I can't.

All I can do now is wait.
Wait for time to pass.
Wait for wounds to heal.
It's stupid how I thought I could stand by you, because I thought you were more than this.

Your actions proved me wrong.
They proved how foolish I was.

You'll never come running back to me,
You'll never apologize.
But if you were to do so, what would I say?
I'm not sure of it myself.

I don't want to leave you behind,
But you don't want to move forward with me.
There's only so much I can do.
Because I can't pull you along, and I can't stay put.

I'm at a loss as to what to do.
You've forced me into a corner, it's sad how we have to throw each other aside.
It's sad how our trust have been broken by your selfishness.

Our foundation's falling apart.
Yet we're standing there watching each other.
Smiling,
Covering up our anxiousness.
This awkwardness, it's going to be there forever.