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"I wonder if I've been changed in the night? Let me think. Was I the same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is 'Who in the world am I?' Ah, that's the great puzzle!" - Alice, Alice In Wonderland.
Sorry.

In retrospect,
This year's birthday has got to be the most unexciting.
But I think this year's birthday present has got to be the best.

The funny thing is,
Somebody's birthday wish to me actually came true.
It said,
"Find someone that you can share your dreams with. Find someone you can trust".

True enough,
I found someone, though I've never imagined it possible.
It's pretty much everything I've wished for.
Perfect birthday present.

& now I keep telling myself, I've got to improve to be good enough.
I don't think I'm doing enough.
Sometimes, I think I really suck.

I can't seem to give reassurance,
And what's worse, I think I add to the insecurities.
I can't convey my emotions.
And it hurts me to see that I'm adding on to that hurt.

I wish I was better.
How do I let you know that I just want to accept you for who you are?
Don't compromise for me.
Don't change.

I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
There's so little I can give to you.
I'm sorry for being so useless.
I'm sorry for making you feel vulnerable.
I'm sorry for adding on to your worries.
I'm sorry I can't give you what you deserve.
I'm sorry.
I really am.

You deserve so much better.
I don't know how to make you understand that.
But I'm working towards getting better.
Please wait for me, please.
I'm so sorry.
Please, forgive me.